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dollsomeTitle: Jim and Pam Wish They Could Pull Off The Powerwalk (In Which The Dollhouse Is Plagued By The Work-Married Phenomenon, At Least According To Topher)
Characters/Pairing: Topher, Ivy, DeWitt/Dominic
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,528
Summary: "Ugh, Topher, don’t tell me you’re reading the relationships section of Yahoo again." Yes. Yes, he is.
Author's Note: Whatever, y'all, it's fic day! It's all silly fluff, all the time up in here!
+
Ivy interrupts him as soon as he pauses to breathe, and what she says is: “Ugh, Topher, don’t tell me you’re reading the relationships section of Yahoo again. You remember how that went last time?”
“Ah-ah-ah. Ivy babe. Hear me out here.”
“Yeah, sure, okay.”
“This is for real. It’s happening all around us! Now, you can turn a blind eye, or you can rub a couple of those adorable little brain cells of yours together, and admit that we’re work married.”
“Uh, we are not work married. We’re not even work dating. We aren’t even, like, you work-ask me for my number and I work-give you a fake one. Okay?”
“It’s a legit phenomenon! Look around, Ives. We’re not the only ones who’re doing it.”
“We’re not doing anything, Topher—”
“Look at Boyd and Saunders! Mr. and Mrs. Doom and Gloom, right there. There’s no way you haven’t seen them hanging out in her office, all mopey and guilty and close-standy … occasionally a little bit gazey—”
“Way to pay attention.”
“Genius, hi.”
“Jealous, hi.”
“Of my genius? You? Aw, Ivy, don’t beat yourself up over it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I understand the impulse. Were I not me, I too would want to punch myself in the inferior cranium at least a little bit. But be fair to yourself. Not everyone can be this—”
“You. Jealous of the Boyd and Saunders situation. Duh.”
“Yeeeeah, well. Boyd’s my man-friend. My special man-migo. If he’s gonna put his close-standy gazey whatever with the Phantom before our fine bromance, then yeah, I’m gonna take some umbrage. Hem hem.”
“You are so lame.”
“Youuu are trying to change the subject, wifey mine. The point is: work marriedness. It’s everywhere. Much like hot willowy twentysomethings in casual workout wear. What about Ramirez and Lewis? You can’t say you haven’t been picking up on that vibeage. Classic case of handlers in desperate want of some handlin’. Or – hey hey hey, here we go – Dom and DeWitt.”
“Oh my God, Topher, fine, I’ll get you the freaking Funyuns, okay? Just stop talking—”
“Mommy and Daddy Dollhouse, right there. Although, okay, sure, DeWitt’s the one wearing the pants in that relationship – well, trousers. ‘Cause, you know, fun fact: to those wily Brits, pants are underwear. Not that she wouldn’t be wearing underwear. Unless—”
“Stop right there or—”
“Or?”
“Or my fingers accidentally slip on the computer and Tango here will wind up with some extra-special ‘Whoopsie! I strangled Topher’ skills.”
“Heh heh. Strangulation. Kinky. You know what, I bet Mr. and Mrs. D-D could get behind that. (Would they hyphenate, do you think? Nah. Dom would probably just take DeWitt's last name. Am I right or am I right? Up top.)”
“Why are you talking.”
“I’m just sayin’. They torture a lot of people, and it never really seems to bum them out. In fact, remember when that security grunt got plastered and mentioned the ol’ DHizzle to one of his drinking buddies? Dom dragged him up to the office, DeWitt shut the door, Judith reported some serious grade-A agonized screaming from within – and afterwards they were both in a weirdly good mood. Methinks that was a prime case of the them equivalent of some serious afterglow. Watching Dom pummel some poor unfortunate lackey -- whoo baby. To DeWitt, that's probably like getting her ear nibbled on. Turning on some Barry White, lowering the lights, pouring a glass of wine, running a sexy bubblebath for two—”
“Oh, gross.”
“There is nothing gross about speculation, Ivy. You know what’s gross? How closed-minded you are. Also: these chips. This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair. Why are you doing this to me?”
“They’re pita chips, moron. They’re good for you. You’re going to go into a diabetic coma if you don’t stop eating like a ten year old whose parents are out of town for the weekend.”
“Which is your primary concern, because you want to take care of me. Because we … are work married. Is it just me, or does this moment merit a hearty ‘booyah’?”
“Topher?”
“Mrs. Brink?”
“I’m work divorcing you.”
“She ready yet?” Dominic, striding in with his usual air of gruff, vaguely pissed off busyness.
“Just throwing in a few finishing touches. You can’t rush perfection, L-dawg.”
“Don’t call me that ever again. And yeah you can, unless you want the whole House to slow down and DeWitt to get upset. Do you really need a reminder of what happens when DeWitt gets upset?”
“You maim, she swoons?”
“What?”
“Nothing, nothing. The old ball and chain getting you down again?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Topher considers the expression on Dominic’s face, and reaches a wise decision. “Nnnnothing.”
“Did I fall asleep?” (Tango.)
(Topher, with extra focus and zeal and one heck of a speedy turn.) “For a little while …”
Dominic turns to Ivy. “What the hell’s he talking about?”
“Topher’s new thing,” Ivy replies, with the bleak composure of someone who’s lost all hope, “is to think that all of us are work married.”
“Work married?”
“I know, right? Seriously, I am blocking his internet access altogether one of these days. Whenever he tries to look into the practices of actual functioning human beings – ugh, let’s just say that way lies badness.”
“And me and DeWitt are—”
“Work married by Parson Brink. Yep. It was a lovely ceremony, filled with talk about torture and underwear.”
“Huh.”
“The way I see it, you scored. At least you’re not stuck with Topher.”
Dominic ushers Tango out. He’s so distracted that he almost doesn’t stop her from flirtatiously fondling his tie (“You know the only thing I love more than a man in a suit?” she purrs, while Dominic ponders exactly what would drive someone to work-marry him to Adelle DeWitt. Yeah, he’s a man and she’s a woman, but it’s not like this is elementary school, so that shouldn’t exactly be a basis for— “A man out of a suit.”) until it’s too late. Fortunately, his reflexes are good. He really likes this tie.
+
“I’m just saying it’s in the best interest of the House to keep her contained for a little while. A week or so. That way, we can keep an eye on her. Make sure her behavior in the tabula rasa state isn’t atypical. Maybe have Topher wipe her a few extra times.”
“To which I reply once again, Mr. Dominic, that I can’t quite see the business sense in allowing our number one Active to spend a week or so fingerpainting and getting massages.”
“Ma’am, I know that you’re reluctant to acknowledge the situation, but there’s no denying that Echo’s behavior lately has been abnormal—”
“I’m not reluctant to acknowledge anything. Save for perhaps your oversensitivity on the matter. Pointing that out just seems in bad taste.”
“Ms. DeWitt—”
“Mr. Dominic?” She arches her eyebrows, leaning back in her chair. Her lips are poised on the verge of a smirk – not quite there yet, but the threat of it is cheerfully apparent. She drives him crazy sometimes.
The old ball and chain getting you down again? Topher’s voice asks in his head. Dominic tells it to shut the hell up. Being related to Topher even slightly, it doesn’t listen. And continues, relentlessly, to annoy him.
“Something on your mind?” DeWitt asks, tilting her head. Her curls brush against her shoulder, looking very dark against the pale blue of her blouse.
“Topher thinks we’re … work married. It’s irrelevant. You were saying?”
“Work married?”
He crosses his arms. “Like I said. It’s irrelevant.”
“That does seem to be your default stance regarding anything said by Topher.”
“Right. So—”
“What exactly constitutes a work marriage?”
“I didn’t really get that part. Spending a lot of time together, I guess. Bickering.”
“Like us,” she surmises.
“I was thinking more along the lines of Topher and Ivy.”
“Ah. Of course.”
“Ivy was about to file for a work divorce.”
“Lamentable, really,” DeWitt deadpans, “that no one can stay together anymore.”
He shrugs, straightfaced. “I guess when the spark is gone …”
She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh. Her lips are curved in a faint smile. Whatever irritation he’d felt at her – well, he can’t quite muster it anymore.
“Three days,” she says then, surprising him.
“What?”
“We’ll keep Echo House-bound for three days. During those three days, Mr. Dominic, you may observe her to your heart’s content. If her behavior is as strange as you seem to believe it is, we will take it into consideration and figure out how to proceed from there. If not, her engagements shall resume.”
“Thank you,” he says, meaning it.
“Yes, well,” she responds, smirking, “I’ve heard the key to a successful marriage is compromise.”
+
“Yeah,” Topher says sagely, watching DeWitt and Dominic stride side-by-side past the lab, “they’re totally work-doing it.”
Ivy rolls her eyes. The next time he’s not looking, she raids the drawer of inappropriate starches and replaces all its contents with stuff she got at Whole Foods.
Characters/Pairing: Topher, Ivy, DeWitt/Dominic
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,528
Summary: "Ugh, Topher, don’t tell me you’re reading the relationships section of Yahoo again." Yes. Yes, he is.
Author's Note: Whatever, y'all, it's fic day! It's all silly fluff, all the time up in here!
+
Ivy interrupts him as soon as he pauses to breathe, and what she says is: “Ugh, Topher, don’t tell me you’re reading the relationships section of Yahoo again. You remember how that went last time?”
“Ah-ah-ah. Ivy babe. Hear me out here.”
“Yeah, sure, okay.”
“This is for real. It’s happening all around us! Now, you can turn a blind eye, or you can rub a couple of those adorable little brain cells of yours together, and admit that we’re work married.”
“Uh, we are not work married. We’re not even work dating. We aren’t even, like, you work-ask me for my number and I work-give you a fake one. Okay?”
“It’s a legit phenomenon! Look around, Ives. We’re not the only ones who’re doing it.”
“We’re not doing anything, Topher—”
“Look at Boyd and Saunders! Mr. and Mrs. Doom and Gloom, right there. There’s no way you haven’t seen them hanging out in her office, all mopey and guilty and close-standy … occasionally a little bit gazey—”
“Way to pay attention.”
“Genius, hi.”
“Jealous, hi.”
“Of my genius? You? Aw, Ivy, don’t beat yourself up over it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I understand the impulse. Were I not me, I too would want to punch myself in the inferior cranium at least a little bit. But be fair to yourself. Not everyone can be this—”
“You. Jealous of the Boyd and Saunders situation. Duh.”
“Yeeeeah, well. Boyd’s my man-friend. My special man-migo. If he’s gonna put his close-standy gazey whatever with the Phantom before our fine bromance, then yeah, I’m gonna take some umbrage. Hem hem.”
“You are so lame.”
“Youuu are trying to change the subject, wifey mine. The point is: work marriedness. It’s everywhere. Much like hot willowy twentysomethings in casual workout wear. What about Ramirez and Lewis? You can’t say you haven’t been picking up on that vibeage. Classic case of handlers in desperate want of some handlin’. Or – hey hey hey, here we go – Dom and DeWitt.”
“Oh my God, Topher, fine, I’ll get you the freaking Funyuns, okay? Just stop talking—”
“Mommy and Daddy Dollhouse, right there. Although, okay, sure, DeWitt’s the one wearing the pants in that relationship – well, trousers. ‘Cause, you know, fun fact: to those wily Brits, pants are underwear. Not that she wouldn’t be wearing underwear. Unless—”
“Stop right there or—”
“Or?”
“Or my fingers accidentally slip on the computer and Tango here will wind up with some extra-special ‘Whoopsie! I strangled Topher’ skills.”
“Heh heh. Strangulation. Kinky. You know what, I bet Mr. and Mrs. D-D could get behind that. (Would they hyphenate, do you think? Nah. Dom would probably just take DeWitt's last name. Am I right or am I right? Up top.)”
“Why are you talking.”
“I’m just sayin’. They torture a lot of people, and it never really seems to bum them out. In fact, remember when that security grunt got plastered and mentioned the ol’ DHizzle to one of his drinking buddies? Dom dragged him up to the office, DeWitt shut the door, Judith reported some serious grade-A agonized screaming from within – and afterwards they were both in a weirdly good mood. Methinks that was a prime case of the them equivalent of some serious afterglow. Watching Dom pummel some poor unfortunate lackey -- whoo baby. To DeWitt, that's probably like getting her ear nibbled on. Turning on some Barry White, lowering the lights, pouring a glass of wine, running a sexy bubblebath for two—”
“Oh, gross.”
“There is nothing gross about speculation, Ivy. You know what’s gross? How closed-minded you are. Also: these chips. This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair. Why are you doing this to me?”
“They’re pita chips, moron. They’re good for you. You’re going to go into a diabetic coma if you don’t stop eating like a ten year old whose parents are out of town for the weekend.”
“Which is your primary concern, because you want to take care of me. Because we … are work married. Is it just me, or does this moment merit a hearty ‘booyah’?”
“Topher?”
“Mrs. Brink?”
“I’m work divorcing you.”
“She ready yet?” Dominic, striding in with his usual air of gruff, vaguely pissed off busyness.
“Just throwing in a few finishing touches. You can’t rush perfection, L-dawg.”
“Don’t call me that ever again. And yeah you can, unless you want the whole House to slow down and DeWitt to get upset. Do you really need a reminder of what happens when DeWitt gets upset?”
“You maim, she swoons?”
“What?”
“Nothing, nothing. The old ball and chain getting you down again?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Topher considers the expression on Dominic’s face, and reaches a wise decision. “Nnnnothing.”
“Did I fall asleep?” (Tango.)
(Topher, with extra focus and zeal and one heck of a speedy turn.) “For a little while …”
Dominic turns to Ivy. “What the hell’s he talking about?”
“Topher’s new thing,” Ivy replies, with the bleak composure of someone who’s lost all hope, “is to think that all of us are work married.”
“Work married?”
“I know, right? Seriously, I am blocking his internet access altogether one of these days. Whenever he tries to look into the practices of actual functioning human beings – ugh, let’s just say that way lies badness.”
“And me and DeWitt are—”
“Work married by Parson Brink. Yep. It was a lovely ceremony, filled with talk about torture and underwear.”
“Huh.”
“The way I see it, you scored. At least you’re not stuck with Topher.”
Dominic ushers Tango out. He’s so distracted that he almost doesn’t stop her from flirtatiously fondling his tie (“You know the only thing I love more than a man in a suit?” she purrs, while Dominic ponders exactly what would drive someone to work-marry him to Adelle DeWitt. Yeah, he’s a man and she’s a woman, but it’s not like this is elementary school, so that shouldn’t exactly be a basis for— “A man out of a suit.”) until it’s too late. Fortunately, his reflexes are good. He really likes this tie.
+
“I’m just saying it’s in the best interest of the House to keep her contained for a little while. A week or so. That way, we can keep an eye on her. Make sure her behavior in the tabula rasa state isn’t atypical. Maybe have Topher wipe her a few extra times.”
“To which I reply once again, Mr. Dominic, that I can’t quite see the business sense in allowing our number one Active to spend a week or so fingerpainting and getting massages.”
“Ma’am, I know that you’re reluctant to acknowledge the situation, but there’s no denying that Echo’s behavior lately has been abnormal—”
“I’m not reluctant to acknowledge anything. Save for perhaps your oversensitivity on the matter. Pointing that out just seems in bad taste.”
“Ms. DeWitt—”
“Mr. Dominic?” She arches her eyebrows, leaning back in her chair. Her lips are poised on the verge of a smirk – not quite there yet, but the threat of it is cheerfully apparent. She drives him crazy sometimes.
The old ball and chain getting you down again? Topher’s voice asks in his head. Dominic tells it to shut the hell up. Being related to Topher even slightly, it doesn’t listen. And continues, relentlessly, to annoy him.
“Something on your mind?” DeWitt asks, tilting her head. Her curls brush against her shoulder, looking very dark against the pale blue of her blouse.
“Topher thinks we’re … work married. It’s irrelevant. You were saying?”
“Work married?”
He crosses his arms. “Like I said. It’s irrelevant.”
“That does seem to be your default stance regarding anything said by Topher.”
“Right. So—”
“What exactly constitutes a work marriage?”
“I didn’t really get that part. Spending a lot of time together, I guess. Bickering.”
“Like us,” she surmises.
“I was thinking more along the lines of Topher and Ivy.”
“Ah. Of course.”
“Ivy was about to file for a work divorce.”
“Lamentable, really,” DeWitt deadpans, “that no one can stay together anymore.”
He shrugs, straightfaced. “I guess when the spark is gone …”
She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh. Her lips are curved in a faint smile. Whatever irritation he’d felt at her – well, he can’t quite muster it anymore.
“Three days,” she says then, surprising him.
“What?”
“We’ll keep Echo House-bound for three days. During those three days, Mr. Dominic, you may observe her to your heart’s content. If her behavior is as strange as you seem to believe it is, we will take it into consideration and figure out how to proceed from there. If not, her engagements shall resume.”
“Thank you,” he says, meaning it.
“Yes, well,” she responds, smirking, “I’ve heard the key to a successful marriage is compromise.”
+
“Yeah,” Topher says sagely, watching DeWitt and Dominic stride side-by-side past the lab, “they’re totally work-doing it.”
Ivy rolls her eyes. The next time he’s not looking, she raids the drawer of inappropriate starches and replaces all its contents with stuff she got at Whole Foods.
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no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:16 am (UTC)And of course, the D/D'ness. But that so goes without saying, amirite?
We aren’t even, like, you work-ask me for my number and I work-give you a fake one.
Ivy snarkle! Yay!
Boyd’s my man-friend. My special man-migo. If he’s gonna put his close-standy gazey whatever with the Phantom before our fine bromance, then yeah, I’m gonna take some umbrage. Hem hem.”
Oh, TOPHER. You DORK. ♥
Also: these chips. This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair.
*dies laughing* And you say I'm the one who writes the goos Topherisms?? What UP.
“Just throwing in a few finishing touches. You can’t rush perfection, L-dawg.”
“Don’t call me that ever again. And yeah you can, unless you want the whole House to slow down and DeWitt to get upset. Do you really need a reminder of what happens when DeWitt gets upset?”
“You maim, she swoons?”
“What?”
L-DAWG. I do not think I will ever, ever get over the image of Topher calling Dominic L-DAWG. And I LOVE IT. I just...I can't even put what I love about this exchange between them into words. It is just perfection.
He’s so distracted that he almost doesn’t stop her from flirtatiously fondling his tie (“You know the only thing I love more than a man in a suit?” she purrs, while Dominic ponders exactly what would drive someone to work-marry him to Adelle DeWitt. Yeah, he’s a man and she’s a woman, but it’s not like this is elementary school, so that shouldn’t exactly be a basis for— “A man out of a suit.”) until it’s too late. Fortunately, his reflexes are good. He really likes this tie.
*dolphin noises* Dominic/awesome ties = secondary OTP. (And I love that he's so oblivious as to why Topher would be pairing him and DeWitt off. Like, really, dude? REALLY?)
Dominic tells it to shut the hell up. Being related to Topher even slightly, it doesn’t listen.
*draws hearts all over this while giggling like a schoolgirl*
“Ivy was about to file for a work divorce.”
“Lamentable, really,” DeWitt deadpans, “that no one can stay together anymore.”
HA! Oh Adelle. You and your humor.
She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh. Her lips are curved in a faint smile. Whatever irritation he’d felt at her – well, he can’t quite muster it anymore.
...and he asks WHY. HONESTLY.
I love you and your brain and anything you ever do with this pairing. ♥
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:36 pm (UTC)Bwahaha, Topher calling him L-Dawg was actually from another fic I was endeavoring to write, and then I stole it from that one to put into this one. Because it needed to be out in the world!
*dolphin noises* Dominic/awesome ties = secondary OTP. (And I love that he's so oblivious as to why Topher would be pairing him and DeWitt off. Like, really, dude? REALLY?)
Right?! Hahaha, I love every aspect of his sartorial appreciation. Ties included. And the obliviousness gives us all the opportunity to picture Reed Diamond doing the Confused Scrunchy Brow. Which might be the most profound motivation behind me including it. Mwahaha.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:23 am (UTC)If it were possible, I'd send some of the cream puffs I'm making, but since the computer people have yet to develop a way to stuff pasty in to a computer (without killing it) and have it act like an e-mail, praise will have to suffice.
BRAVO!!
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:26 am (UTC)Fantastic fic, BTW. ♥
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:39 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading!
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:51 pm (UTC)If my Topher winds up sounding half as fabulous as your Topher, I think I'll be very happy.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:34 am (UTC)The DD do seem to enjoy their torture, don't they? :)
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:41 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading!
no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 02:55 am (UTC)I AM FILLED WITH SUCH FANGIRLY GLEE LATELY. THANK YOU FOR HELPING TO FEED MY ADDICTION.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 03:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 05:48 am (UTC)I love this.
Methinks that was a prime case of the them equivalent of some serious afterglow. Watching Dom pummel some poor unfortunate lackey -- whoo baby. To DeWitt, that's probably like getting her ear nibbled on. Turning on some Barry White, lowering the lights, pouring a glass of wine, running a sexy bubblebath for two—”
ROFL.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 05:57 am (UTC)<3 <3
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 06:53 am (UTC)“Heh heh. Strangulation. Kinky. You know what, I bet Mr. and Mrs. D-D could get behind that. (Would they hyphenate, do you think? Nah. Dom would probably just take DeWitt's last name. Am I right or am I right? Up top.)”
You know, with these two, you really wouldn't know. I have this notion that in the even that D/D do get married, it'll be totally okay with Dom if DeWitt doesn't use his last name. And then there's there's this thought that DeWitt won't use her husband's last name unless it's for legal purposes (you know, stuff that involves contracts and the law, blah). And then it's also totally in-character that she'd hyphenate.. IDK why I'm thinking about this. lawlz.
Oh, Ivy. So snarky. *loves*
“There is nothing gross about speculation, Ivy. You know what’s gross? How closed-minded you are. Also: these chips. This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair. Why are you doing this to me?”
Despair: can only be tasted in lab grown meats and in pita chips. *nods head*
She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh. Her lips are curved in a faint smile. Whatever irritation he’d felt at her – well, he can’t quite muster it anymore.
HEE. <3
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:45 pm (UTC)I am pretty sure that there's no way Adelle would change her last name. Maybe this has a lot to do with the fact that I regard the name Adelle DeWitt as some sort of emblem of holy perfection, WHO KNOWS! Although the notion of them and alliterating D-named hyphenation is pretty cute, we all know it to be true!
Despair: can only be tasted in lab grown meats and in pita chips. *nods head*
Hahaha! Somehow in the back of my head I knew that I was stealing that from something. Better off Ted, you will always be funnier than me! But quite frankly, that's something I will happily live with.
no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 07:36 am (UTC)Adelle and Dom are totally work-married (and I love how she doesn't care/accepts it).
I'm constantly amazed at how well you write Topher, it's wonderful!
no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:46 pm (UTC)warning: The CapsLock button is ABUSED!
Date: 2010-01-23 08:56 am (UTC)We aren’t even, like, you work-ask me for my number and I work-give you a fake one. Okay?
Totally random but this line has me shipping Ivy and Judith, and you know that seems awesome, so go you for inspiring my mind!
Boyd’s my man-friend. My special man-migo. If he’s gonna put his close-standy gazey whatever with the Phantom before our fine bromance, then yeah, I’m gonna take some umbrage.
How can you write Topher SO WELL?! The combination of extra "y"s and Joss speak with a word like umbrage. Perfect.
"Mommy and Daddy Dollhouse, right there."
Totally my new nickname for them.
Strangulation. Kinky. You know what, I bet Mr. and Mrs. D-D could get behind that. (Would they hyphenate, do you think? Nah. Dom would probably just take DeWitt's last name.)
First, they totally had sex on the couch in Epitaph One because of this line. Second, he would so take her last name. And then people would be confused as to what to call him, and he would revel in that, because haha, the inferiority of others to he and his boss-lady-love.
I’m just sayin’. They torture a lot of people, and it never really seems to bum them out. In fact, remember when that security grunt got plastered and mentioned the ol’ DHizzle to one of his drinking buddies? Dom dragged him up to the office, DeWitt shut the door, Judith reported some serious grade-A agonized screaming from within – and afterwards they were both in a weirdly good mood.
I just love this whole thing. I mean obviously torturing equating to happiness in the D/D world is you know, amazing but then how you wrote the rest of that, awesome.
You know what’s gross? How closed-minded you are. Also: these chips. This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair. Why are you doing this to me?
YOUR TOPHER IS SO TOPHER
"Do you really need a reminder of what happens when DeWitt gets upset?"
“You maim, she swoons?”
I don't know what is more amazing about this exchange that Laurence would cooly remind everyone of how AWE INSPIRING AND AMAZING and vaguely evil his boss
-lady-loveis or Topher's response of perfection AND TRUTH!I love where Dominic is talking to Ivy, and he is just so confused, and both of them just go on ignoring his confusion. No wonder Dominic has not so latent violent tendencies towards Topher and Ivy.
Dominic ushers Tango out. He’s so distracted that he almost doesn’t stop her from flirtatiously fondling his tie (“You know the only thing I love more than a man in a suit?” she purrs, while Dominic ponders exactly what would drive someone to work-marry him to Adelle DeWitt. Yeah, he’s a man and she’s a woman, but it’s not like this is elementary school, so that shouldn’t exactly be a basis for— “A man out of a suit.”) until it’s too late. Fortunately, his reflexes are good. He really likes this tie.
I have no idea where to start with this paragraph because IT IS SO PERFECT!!!!!! Doll's hitting on Dominic, hilarious. Him liking his tie, hilarious and in character. "Fortunately, his reflexes are good." Great simple line and position within the narration. And Tango's chat up line so broken up by Dominic going Adelle, Adelle, me and Adelle, Adelle.
Save for perhaps your oversensitivity on the matter. Pointing that out just seems in bad taste.
Oh, burned. And so in character.
the threat of it is cheerfully apparent
Fantastic line with the contrast between threat and cheerfully, and also perfect because I perfectly recall that expression on Olivia Williams face.
Topher’s voice asks in his head. Dominic tells it to shut the hell up. Being related to Topher even slightly, it doesn’t listen. And continues, relentlessly, to annoy him.
I love Dom's head. I just do, he is snarky and amusing and just kind of fun to read. ...when not making one cry.
“Topher thinks we’re … work married. It’s irrelevant. You were saying?”
I love that he tells her, I think it kind of says something awesome about their relationship.
AND JUST ADELLE! She was so scarily perfect and awesome and having powerful restraint if she was not doing more with her head of security.
Re: warning: The CapsLock button is ABUSED!
Date: 2010-01-24 05:50 pm (UTC)Totally random but this line has me shipping Ivy and Judith, and you know that seems awesome, so go you for inspiring my mind!
A+, SHIP ON, I SAY. I really think that after the show ends we should construct a whole Dollhouse universe that is sort of like Dollhouse done Gilmore Girls style, where it's all quirky hilarity within the realm of the Dollhouse and everyone is just funny & shippable & awesome.
I love where Dominic is talking to Ivy, and he is just so confused, and both of them just go on ignoring his confusion. No wonder Dominic has not so latent violent tendencies towards Topher and Ivy.
Ha ha ha! While I was writing that, I was wondering whether Ivy and Dominic conversing so freely was kind of weird, and whether that contradicted what we saw onscreen. I like your interpretation, wherein it was just fuel in the It's Cool, I'll Just Label Them Collateral Damage & Kill Them! fire.
Fantastic line with the contrast between threat and cheerfully, and also perfect because I perfectly recall that expression on Olivia Williams face.
I AM PRETTY SURE IT IS THE FACE IN THIS ICON. I was so totally, shamelessly channeling that.
Again: THANK YOU, awesome person!
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Date: 2010-01-23 10:13 am (UTC)Just when I thought you reached fanfic writing perfection you pull an A+ Topher and Ivy outta the bag alongside what is probably the best thing ever. Dom and Adelle, Mr and Mrs Dollhouse, are totally work married and work doing it.
♥
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:51 pm (UTC)thank you for reading, dear lovely person! :D
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Date: 2010-01-23 05:22 pm (UTC)Love Dominic and Dewitt's reactions to the work-married thing. So, SO how it would work, Dominic all defensive and annoyed, Adelle amused by how defensive and annoyed he was.
YAY YOU.
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 05:56 pm (UTC)This was seriously hilarious! Made me go lol more than a few times. L-DAWG!!! Seriously!! :D
I love you for writing fluff for those guys ;)
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 09:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 05:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-23 10:01 pm (UTC)YES THIS. I actually lol'd through most of this fic, it's brilliant.
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 02:20 am (UTC)And this line just kicks ass:
"She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh."
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-01-24 07:45 am (UTC)Your ability to write Topher is amazing, and I love Ivy in this so much. It is bar-none the best Ivy I have ever read!
My special man-migo. If he’s gonna put his close-standy gazey whatever with the Phantom before our fine bromance, then yeah, I’m gonna take some umbrage.
EVERYTHING TOPHER SAYS IN THIS IS COMEDY GOLD. And I love his jealousy of Claire stepping in on his beloved bromance and Ivy totally calling him on.
“Watching Dom pummel some poor unfortunate lackey -- whoo baby. To DeWitt, that's probably like getting her ear nibbled on.”
Okay the whole paragraph this quote was from was amazing, BECAUSE IT IS TRUE. IT IS SO TRUE. I will always and forever love their adorable (ahaha word choice) ability to bond over torturing people, it is true. And then he just segues straight into whining about his chips and how are you so amazing at writing Topher.
ALSO, IVY WOULD LIKE A WORK DIVORCE, BECAUSE IVY IS THE BEST. AND TANGO, NOBODY IS GOING TO BLAME YOU FOR TRYING HONEY.
“I’m not reluctant to acknowledge anything. Save for perhaps your oversensitivity on the matter. Pointing that out just seems in bad taste.” “Ms. DeWitt—” “Mr. Dominic?” She arches her eyebrows, leaning back in her chair. Her lips are poised on the verge of a smirk – not quite there yet, but the threat of it is cheerfully apparent. She drives him crazy sometimes.
IS THERE ANYTHING MORE AWESOME THAN DEWITT LIGHTLY TAUNTING DOMINIC? I THINK NOT. Ahh I love how she likes to sometimes get a rise out of him, it's amazing. Also good line Adelle!
“Lamentable, really,” DeWitt deadpans, “that no one can stay together anymore.” He shrugs, straightfaced. “I guess when the spark is gone …” She makes a little appreciative sound in the back of her throat, the more elegant, less drawn-out cousin of a laugh. Her lips are curved in a faint smile. Whatever irritation he’d felt at her – well, he can’t quite muster it anymore.
And ah, it's like everything that is amazing and joyous about them in one neat exchange! They're both just so clever and amazing and love all of their bantering in this fic.
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Date: 2010-01-24 05:56 pm (UTC)I will always and forever love their adorable (ahaha word choice) ability to bond over torturing people, it is true.
I love how we have all become adoring & sentimental over this. Awww, torture! They make it special!
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Date: 2011-12-14 06:49 pm (UTC)Oh gosh, I...I just want to quote everything back to you...BUT I SHALL TRY TO RESTRAIN MYSELF!
The title!
“Oh my God, Topher, fine, I’ll get you the freaking Funyuns, okay? Just stop talking—”
"...(Would they hyphenate, do you think? Nah. Dom would probably just take DeWitt's last name. Am I right or am I right? Up top.)”
“Why are you talking.”
"This is like eating cardboard flavored with a hint of crippling despair."
“I’m work divorcing you.”
TOPHER&IVY! Eeeeee! Ohmygosh, I love their dialogue, how Ivy just sits there dying with the bleak composure of someone who's lost all hope and Topher doesn't stop!
Fortunately, his reflexes are good. He really likes this tie.
Dominic and his suits! Ahahahhahahaha!
Being related to Topher even slightly, it doesn’t listen. And continues, relentlessly, to annoy him.
Topher, you are contagious! :D :D :D
And then you made it sweet and cute at the end! :D :D :D :D ♥!