dollsome: (HIMYM ● b&r › kiss)
dollsome ([personal profile] dollsome) wrote2008-05-06 02:25 pm

through and through (Barney/Robin)

Title: through and through
Pairing: Barney/Robin
Spoilers: through 3x18 - "Rebound Bro"
Rating: PG
Word Count: 2,173
Summary: Post-"Rebound Bro." Barney and Robin patch things up.
Author's Note: Ahhh, the product of my first day of pointless summer vacationing! This wound up a lot longer and sappier than I meant for it to be. Yaaaay?


--

Robin hadn’t meant to stay out any later than necessary tonight. As she’d left the house, cursing under her breath and imagining really big pianos being dropped on Barney, she’d devised a plan. It went a little something like this – go; unenthusiastically play along with whatever insane thing Barney wanted her to do for exactly thirty minutes; leave.

Not so much.

Even after Randy stops bleeding all over everything long enough to take off with a girl, Robin can’t quite bring herself to leave: first because Barney comes over to her, all triumphant and smiling, and it’s one of those moments where she can’t help but really like him; and then because he gets all choked up over Ted. After she’s successfully talked him down from his Ted woe for the second time, she feels guilty about the idea of just leaving him there. So she stays.

Secretly, she’s a little glad. Life is weird without Barney in it.

They sit and talk for about an hour, catching up on stuff like work and Marshall and Lily and how depressingly impossible it is to find a quality bro in this day and age.

“You let me down, by the way,” Barney adds, tilting his drink accusingly in her direction.

She feels a tiny, unwanted flash of guilt, and quashes it by retorting, “I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“Fair point,” Barney acknowledges, and clinks his glass with hers. By now, all traces of being pissed off about having to change back out of her pajamas and come all the way back to the bar at midnight have pretty much disappeared.

"There wasn't a sex tape," he adds.

"I figured," she replies, and does a pretty good job at hiding her relief.

"Really?" The corners of his mouth twist up, equal parts smirk and smile; it's that look he gets when he's on the way to figuring her out, and enjoying the journey way too much. "Then why'd you come?"

She finishes off her drink and starts on the story of Stu the Teleprompter Guy getting accidentally stoned on cough syrup. Barney listens attentively, but there's still that spark of interest in his eye.

It’s all great until they finally decide to call it quits for the night. As Barney’s getting up, he asks, like it’s the most casual thing in the world, “You wanna come back to my place?”

It’s like getting stabbed in the heart with the reminder that he’s a big, skeezy jackass. “Barney, I am not sleeping with you again.”

“I meant you could crash there so you don’t have to go back to Brooklyn,” Barney replies, rolling his eyes. Despite herself, she blushes a little. He leers at her, but in a way that’s playful and harmless and Barney. “Scherbatsky, come on. Been there, done that. How long have you known me?”

She scowls, but takes him up on it anyway.

She’s heard a lot about La Casa de Stinson from Lily, but the descriptions haven’t quite done it justice. It is sort of sparse and soulless and horrifying, like Lily said – the kind of place that seems like an actual human being with moral integrity and feelings has never set foot in it.

It’s also weirdly awesome.

“I know, right?” Barney grins, pleased at her approval. “I sensed that you would appreciate it. Your sense of awesome is finely honed. Lily just bought throw pillows.”

Robin feigns a horrified gasp. “That bitch.”

Barney shakes his head mournfully. “Don’t I know it. So,” he adds, pointing, “bedroom’s that way.”

“Barney! We are not sleeping together!”

“For all that stuff about Ted and Male Gail being sensitive, they must have sucked at chivalry,” Barney replies witheringly. “You take the bed. I’ll take the couch.”

Her heart does something weird and fluttery. “Barney, you don’t have to—”

“Okay,” he interrupts easily, shrugging and turning in the direction of the bedroom. “’Night.”

She catches his arm, dragging him backward. “Actually, you do have to. That was just being polite. That bed is mine.”

“Damn it!”

After she’s washed up and changed into one of his t-shirts (which feels suspiciously coupley, but it doesn’t matter because she’s not thinking about it, no sir), she comes out to say goodnight. Barney’s reclining on the couch, squinting at the ungodly light of the television.

“You know, this’ll probably cause permanent eye damage somewhere along the line,” Robin reflects, cringing a little as she faces the TV head on. He’s watching some infomercial involving a lot of people grinning and gasping in awe at a really shiny salad strainer. It is genuinely enthralling.

“Yeah,” Barney answers, unconcerned. “It’s worth it.”

There’s not really an argument there. This TV is freaking amazing. “Oh, so worth it.”

He moves his feet, shifting into a sitting position, and she takes the vacant space on the end of the couch.

“Thanks for letting me stay,” she says, kicking his foot lightly.

“No problem,” he answers, looking away from the TV to give her a slight smile. “You may have let me down when I thought it counted, but tonight proved that deep down you’re a bro, through and through.”

“Cool.” They settle into comfortable silence. She snuggles a little deeper into the couch, and in the process her shoulder winds up against his. There’s no explosion of a billion tiny fireworks, no jolt of memory that sends her shooting backward, and she likes that. Sure, one time not too long ago they were all naked and entangled, but she’s still Robin and he’s still Barney and they’re still them.

Almost without meaning to, she says, “I’ve missed you, Barney.”

“You too.” He doesn’t look over at her.

She doesn’t want to open the whole big broke-up can of worms again, but she can’t help saying it. “I hate that things are like this now.”

“You seem to be the only one,” he replies, the last word strangling itself. His voice is choked and high as he adds, pointing at the TV, “Oh, look. This salad strainer doubles as a helmet. Gotta get me one of those.”

“Please,” Robin snorts, tossing a glare at the television. “Marshall and Lily and I figured that out like forever ago. And Barney—”

“Marshall and Lily,” Barney repeats, and doesn’t say anything else.

The silence is horrible. Even more so because Salad Strainer/Helmet Salesman Guy’s voice is seriously annoying.

“They do miss you,” Robin finally says, knocking her shoulder gently against his.

“Yeah.” She tries to tell herself his eyes are just watery because of the TV screen.

“And besides, they’re sort of Ted’s,” she adds rationally, and hates saying it. “They’ve known him longer. I guess it’s only fair that they take his side in this thing. But I’m—” She stops herself just before ‘yours’ slips out of her mouth. “—I’m okay with being Team Barney on this one.”

He’s quiet for a long time. When he does finally look over at her, he’s got a grateful smile on his face. “Spoken like a true bro.”

“You know it,” she replies, smiling back. After a moment, she muses, “Do bros hug?”

“Nope,” Barney answers crisply. “Bros operate on a strict high-five, fist-bump policy. Except when enacting Bro Code Article Fifty-Six.” Off her puzzled look, he adds, “I’ll loan you my copy sometime.”

She laughs a little, and wraps her arms around him. At first he just stays all stiff, and for a few seconds she suspects he’s going to push her off and demand a fist bump instead. Instead, his arms come down to loop around her. His hands are steady and warm against the small of her back. She closes her eyes for just a minute.

“Robin,” he murmurs into her hair, “you just broke the Bro Code.”

“Well, then, I guess we’re in that boat together,” she answers, pulling away so she can look at him.

It startles her. His face is open, and sort of sad. He looks young, she realizes.

“You’re a really good friend,” he says plainly.

She doesn’t know what to say back. She gets him, in a way she’s not sure everyone else does. It’s no secret that there’s more to Barney than being an obnoxious womanizer – they wouldn’t put up with him otherwise – but at the same time, she doesn’t know if Marshall and Lily and Ted really get it. Being alone is scary, and it’s hard, but it’s solid. Opening your heart is worse, because what it means is changing, and sacrificing, and for what? Odds are, you’re just going to get your heart broken anyway.

And that’s what this is, really. Ted was the most important person in Barney’s life, and now he’s watching infomercials and hanging out with morons like Randy to hide from the fact that his heart’s broken.

There’s a stupid lump in her throat all of a sudden, and she doesn’t quite know what she’s doing when she reaches out and presses her palm against his face. For a split-second, he looks at her in surprise, but then there’s no pulling back, no ‘what the hell, Robin?’ Instead, he leans into her touch, with something a lot like weakness, or desperation. God, she gets that. She gets that need to touch someone, to be touched, to crumble when somebody else is watching. Burying it can get so hard.

She trails her thumb down the line of his jaw – a place that she’s kissed, but that doesn’t seem as important as this. His head turns, slightly; the corner of his mouth begins to brush her palm.

Warning bells. Lots and lots of warning bells, which are thankfully just loud enough to cancel out the friggin’ choir of ‘Do this, this is good, this feels so gooooood, remember how good this feels?’ voices.

“We’re not having sex again,” she announces, shooting away from him. All of a sudden she can hear the TV again; she’s not sure how she managed to drown it out in the first place.

“I didn’t say we were,” he replies, frowning at her.

“That felt sexy,” she accuses, scrambling off of the couch.

“Don’t blame me, Random Face Caresser,” Barney shoots back. “That was all you.”

“That was platonic!”

“Then why did it feel sexy?” he demands defiantly.

“That was your fault,” she insists, glaring at him. “You gave me sex eyes.”

He scoffs. “I did not give you sex eyes! Those are just my eyes.”

“Those were sex eyes,” she repeats sternly.

“Newsflash, Robin: I have a lot of sex,” he says, all scathingly matter-of-fact. “It wouldn’t be the craziest thing in the world if my normal eyes turned into sex eyes permanently.”

“I’m going to bed,” she declares. Her heart is racing really inconveniently. “Alone!”

“Face Caresser!” he calls after her as she storms down the hall.

“Sex Eyes!” she shouts back.

There’s about ten seconds of really tense silence. Then—

“So, you wanna go grab coffee in the morning?”

She bites back a laugh. “Yeah, okay.”

True to Lily’s word, Barney’s bed has one blanket and one pillow. Robin’s torn between finding this sad and ingenious. She can still hear the TV blaring in the living room as she sinks into bed and pulls the blanket up to her chin. The pillowcase is cool against her cheek. She’s probably the first woman who’s ever gotten to reap the benefits of either.

This is where Barney sleeps, she thinks, like it’s something that matters.

The thought freaks her out, for no logical reason. She switches instead to contemplating just how much action this bed must have seen. It’s disturbing in a welcome way.

The next morning, after a pretty epic battle over the one towel (Robin emerges victorious, and Barney salves his wounds by pointing out that it’s not a big deal because he’s already rubbed all over her body anyway), they set off to get coffee. The doorman kind of gawks at them. Robin guesses he’s not used to seeing Barney actually leave with the same woman he arrived with. (Or any woman at all.) When they get to Starbucks she buys, figuring Barney’s green tea can be written off as rent.

“Tell you what,” she says, sitting across from him at a table, “I’m going to talk to Marshall and Lily today, and we’ll figure out a time for the four of us to hang out.”

“I guess,” Barney replies, devil-may-care attitude firmly in place. “If I can fit it into my schedule. I’ve got a lot going on, breaking in my awesome new bro. Something tells me that Randy has the makings of a sex god.”

“You do realize I’m not buying this, right?” Robin arches an eyebrow.

“Uh, nice try, Scherbatsky,” Barney responds, holding up his tea. “I watched you pay for it.”

She rolls her eyes.

“Hanging out with Marshall and Lily would be cool,” he adds casually, then tries to shift her attention by ogling a pair of giggling blondes walking into the coffeeshop.

Robin smiles.


[identity profile] allthingsholy.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Ha, very adorable and them.

...

Why can't awesome things like this happen on the actual show? The travesty, it's of epic proportions.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :D

And IT'S SO HAPPENING OFFSCREEN. . . . although it would be roughly a trillion times better if it were happening onscreen. Come on, showww!

[identity profile] rossetti.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude, this is awesome. Instant classic.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you muchly! :)

[identity profile] chunkeymonkey81.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:49 pm (UTC)(link)
This is....as Randy would say...Legendary--wait for it--dary!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Heeeee, thank you! :)

[identity profile] boundbyspells.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh! Oh!!! You got me, you totally got me. This is so hot and cute and squeeful and sweet, and I totally love you. I HOPE THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING.

“Newsflash, Robin: I have a lot of sex,” he says, all scathingly matter-of-fact. “It wouldn’t be the craziest thing in the world if my normal eyes turned into sex eyes permanently.”

Brilliant.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
Aww, thank you! :D

I HOPE THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING.

WORDITY WORD WORD. Come on, show!

[identity profile] theafterimages.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:07 pm (UTC)(link)
This is amazing, and probably one of the best HIMYM fics I've read so far. Every single part of it was perfect. I loved the insights into their characters, and how it went from serious to funny and back again. And the dialogue was spot-on. Thanks for sharing!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, wow, thank you so much! :) I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

[identity profile] arabian.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Lovely, just absolutely lovely! :D

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :D
ext_23449: Book addict icon (awesome - totally freaking)

[identity profile] idea-of-sarcasm.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Basically, you have to write Barney and Robin together after every episode - how does that sound? All the awesome off camera action we don't get to see. Or, heck, 'what could happen in place of next episode'. As with the last of yours, the characterization is spot on.

They should hire you to write for the show.

Of course then it would be about Barney/Robin instead of the 'mother'.

But so worth it :)

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you! :D

They should hire you to write for the show.

Of course then it would be about Barney/Robin instead of the 'mother'.


Hahaha! Oh, heck yes! How Aunt Robin and Uncle Barney Slowly But Surely And Awesomely Fell In Love, Also Occasionally Featuring Somebody's Future Mother, Maybe, But Who Really Cares?

Because, ya know, it's not like the title's long enough already. ;-)

[identity profile] christ-chexx-4u.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:33 pm (UTC)(link)
oh my god this is so BRILLIANTLY in-character. sweet and poignant, but still very fitting in the way they shy away from something real, and the teasing was spot-on. so perfect.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you so much! :D

[identity profile] fresleyforever.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:45 pm (UTC)(link)
This was a pure joy to read!

You nail the characters perfectly and it's funny, yet touching and sad at the same time!

Wonderful :)

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much! :)

[identity profile] scoob2222.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:47 pm (UTC)(link)
awwww this is so perfect, i just want to hug barney

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you! :) And, dude, Barney needs some hugs lately! Poor guy.

[identity profile] cold-campbells.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)
This is adorable, amusing, and totally, completely them. I love it. :D

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you so much! :)

[identity profile] whirligigged.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh. Oh, Barney. This was in turns lovely, hilarious, and a little heartbreaking, and often all at once!

“It wouldn’t be the craziest thing in the world if my normal eyes turned into sex eyes permanently.”
I feel as if I am watching the actual show! The line just made me bark in surprised laughter. Barney. <3

My favorite part, though - besides the face-caressing and sex eyes, and the bed argument and the towel scuffle (how is there so much awesome in this story, again?) - was Robin getting it. I think you just summarized perfectly in story form why Robin and Barney just plain work.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 01:59 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you, buddy! :D I have way too much fun writing these two. Possibly a crazy, frightening amount of fun.

[identity profile] strawberrytatoo.livejournal.com 2008-05-06 11:58 pm (UTC)(link)
*sigh*

This just broke my heart a little. Oh, BARNEY.

Total love.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:00 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you! :)

[identity profile] cashewdani.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 12:23 am (UTC)(link)
See, I wanted them to kiss with the face caressing and sex eyes! My brain is trying to destroy the dynamics of the group over and over again! However, my brain was sated by the awesomeness of This is where Barney sleeps, she thinks, like it’s something that matters.

Thank you for making the 2 of them bros again!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
:D Thank youuuu!

I have this terrible habit of teasing the world with face caressing and sex eyes and then thwarting the whole thing! IT'S LIKE A SICKNESS. But clearly people actually being happy and/or resolving their issues and/or MAKING OUT is kinda too much to . . . expect from fanfiction? Right. Briiing onnn the pain! Or at least the denial.

(no subject)

[identity profile] kennyjobe.livejournal.com - 2008-10-17 08:49 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] hollywood-song.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
Oh man, you write badawful tension so, so well. There were so many wincing moments.

Also, HAH. That sex eyes/face caresser arguement is fantastic. And Robin understanding him, and not in a cheesy I-want-to-feel-your-soul-color sort of way, either. In a totally believable why-aren't-you-crazy-kids-together sort of way. Ah! Wonderful job. Please write the next episode. Thanks.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you so much! :D

[identity profile] takethewords.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
Eeek, I loved this. You should go write for the show. Yeah. hehe

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:03 am (UTC)(link)
Heee! Carter 'n Bays, I'm comin' to join ya!

I'm sure they'd be ... thrilled?

Thanks for reading! :D

[identity profile] spoonishly.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:07 am (UTC)(link)
SEX EYES! I so want to scream that at friends of mine now. This was awesome.

So great! It's funny and sweet and adorable and realistic (I really love how Robin described Marshall and Lily as Ted's and herself as TEAM BARNEY).

Lovely!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
Awwww, thank you muchly! :D

TEAM BARNEY FTW.

[identity profile] imelda72.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
This was GREAT! You're really putting your vacation to good use. Why, oh why, oh why was this not the actual episode? This would have been perfection. It IS perfection, as fanfic. Loved it!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
Yaaay, thank you! :D I am fully looking forward to devoting all future free time to Brotp obsession. I like to think it's my calling in life.

[identity profile] egeanin.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:16 am (UTC)(link)
This is amazing! Really in character and yet somehow romantic...in that BarneyandRobin sort of way. :) Love it!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:05 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you muchly! :D

[identity profile] scubagurl22.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
I liked how you had them "getting" each other. Neither are originals to the Ted group, come to think of it have we seen Robin or Barney in any of the flash forwards?

The talk about understanding being alone and how losing a friend can break your heart were my favorite parts. That and the talk about the tv and the towel.

Great fic!

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you very much! :D

Neither are originals to the Ted group, come to think of it have we seen Robin or Barney in any of the flash forwards?

We so haven't! Which makes me really curious. I like to think that this is because they are off being in love and awesome. THAT'S RIGHT.

(no subject)

[identity profile] scubagurl22.livejournal.com - 2008-05-08 03:40 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] melroseee.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 02:05 am (UTC)(link)
Loved this! Amazing. Great job!
Definitely gonna start yelling "Sex eyes!" at my friends now.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
:D Thank you!

And, haha, your friends are so lucky!

[identity profile] fearlessfan.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 02:29 am (UTC)(link)
This was great! The hug and moments post-hug were particularly lovely.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you very much! :D

[identity profile] brandyleigh.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
I love this so much. After Randy left, what did they do? They HAD to do something, right? And I'm going to pretend that this is what happened, even though it would be awesome if we actually saw it onscreen.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:07 am (UTC)(link)
Thank youuu! :D

After Randy left, what did they do? They HAD to do something, right?

EXACTLY. It was the wee hours of the morning! They were alone at the bar together! Barney was weepy over Ted! Again! I just need to believe that something awesome happened afterward.

[identity profile] imyourally.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 03:33 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, wow, that was really well written. It wasn't cheesy at all, and it was oh so believable. I love how you described how Robin gets Barney. They were both very human in this, and I liked it a lot.

“Don’t blame me, Random Face Caresser,” Barney shoots back. “That was all you.”

That made me laugh out loud.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:08 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, thank you so much! :D I'm glad it was believable -- I have a lot of fun dealing with somewhat schmoopy-ish situations and still trying to keep them, well, Barney and Robin. Because that is what makes them AWESOME.

[identity profile] hollywood-song.livejournal.com 2008-05-07 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
OH MY GOD I already replied but I just realized (and by "realized" I mean "accidentally stumbled on information through stalking") that you're my absolute favorite Office author on ff.net. So, kudos.

[identity profile] dollsome.livejournal.com 2008-05-08 02:09 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, yay! :D I am flattered to hear it!

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